Battles

Battles between various characters occur frequently in the series. These battles sometimes end with characters being killed.

Heroes vs CATS

Link vs Ganondorf

• Occurs in: "Master Chief Sucks at Ordering Finales"
• Combatants: Link vs Ganondorf
• Other Participants: Mario and Luigi
• Deaths: Ganondorf
• Summary: Link dueled Ganondorf and successfully stabbed him through the chest.

Samus vs Ridley

• Occurs in: "Master Chief Sucks at Ordering Finales"
• Combatants: Samus vs Ridley
• Other Participants: Mario and Luigi
• Deaths: Ridley
• Summary: Samus fought Ridley and managed to knock him off a cliff to his death.

Master Chief vs CATS

• Occurs in: "Master Chief Sucks at Ordering Finales"
• Combatants: Master Chief vs CATS
• Summary: Master Chief confronted CATS and threw his image in the recycle bin.

Master Chief vs Jack Thompson

Master Chief vs Jack Thompson

• Occurs in: "Master Chief vs Jack Thompson"
• Combatants: Master Chief vs Jack Thompson
• Summary: Master Chief had a fistfight with Jack Thompson to stop him from having Halo 3 banned. Though Thompson was seemingly killed, he actually survived.

Heroes vs L. Ron Hubbard

Xenu vs L. Ron Hubbard

• Occurs in: "Master Chief vs Scientology"
• Combatants: Xenu vs L. Ron Hubbard
• Deaths: Xenu
• Summary: Xenu is freed by Master Chief, the Arbiter, and Anonymous and fights Hubbard in a lightsaber duel. Hubbard kills Xenu.

Master Chief vs L. Ron Hubbard

• Occurs in: "Master Chief vs Scientology"
• Combatants: Master Chief vs L. Ron Hubbard
• Other Participants: The Arbiter and Anonymous
• Summary: Master Chief "uses the Force" and seemingly kills Hubbard. However, like Thompson, Hubbard survived.

Heroes vs the Network

Mario, Link, and Samus vs CATS

• Occurs in: "Master Chief: The Finale (Part 1)"
• Combatants: Mario, Link, and Samus vs CATS
• Summary: Mario, Link, and Samus were sent as a distraction to fight CATS. All three were captured, imprisoned, and later killed.

Master Chief vs Jack Thompson

• Occurs in: "Master Chief: The Finale (Part 1)"
• Combatants: Master Chief vs Jack Thompson
• Summary: Master Chief found that Thompson had cloned himself. Master Chief put up a fight but was quickly overwhelmed and forced to fleee.

The Arbiter vs L. Ron Hubbard

• Occurs in: "Master Chief: The Finale (Part 1)"
• Combatants: The Arbiter vs L. Ron Hubbard
• Other Participants: Tom Cruise
• Deaths: L. Ron Hubbard
• Summary: The Arbiter sword dueled Hubbard and managed to stab him to death. However, he was then captured by Tom Cruise.

Master Chief vs CATS

Master Chief vs CATS

• Occurs in: "Master Chief: The Finale (Part 2)"
• Combatants: Master Chief vs CATS
• Other Participants: The King
• Deaths: CATS
• Summary: Master Chief dueled CATS with lightsabers one final time. The duel was interrupted when the King appeared and shot CATS for outliving his usefulness. Master Chief was then captured.

Democrats vs Republicans

Obama vs McCain

• Occurs in: "Master Chief Sucks at Voting"
• Combatants: Barack Obama and Joe Biden vs John McCain and Sarah Palin
• Summary: As part of the 2008 presidential election, the Republican candidates physically fought the Democratic candidates. As in real life, Obama and Biden were successful.

Heroes vs Hillary Clinton (Round 1)

Master Chief vs Hillary Clinton

Master Chief and the Arbiter vs Hillary Clinton

• Occurs in: "Master Chief vs the Superweapon"
• Combatants: Master Chief and the Arbiter vs Hillary Clinton
• Summary: Master Chief and the Arbiter confronted Clinton as she was preparing to leave for the Ark portal. They had a lightsaber duel, and the Arbiter was wounded. Master Chief fought Hillary alone before being wounded himself.

Cortana vs Hillary Clinton

• Occurs in: "Master Chief vs the Superweapon"
• Combatants: Cortana vs Hillary Clinton
• Summary: Cortana appeared and fought Clinton as she was about to kill Master Chief and the Arbiter. Cortana successfully repelled Hillary, but she caused a distraction and escaped to the Ark.

Heroes vs Hillary Clinton (Round 2)

Master Chief and the Arbiter vs Hillary Clinton

• Occurs in: "Master Chief vs Hillary Clinton"
• Combatants: Master Chief and the Arbiter vs Hillary Clinton
• Summary: After capturing the King and using him as bait, Hillary dueled Master Chief and the Arbiter again. Once again, the Arbiter was injured, but this time Master Chief gained the upper hand and made Clinton flee.

Cortana vs Hillary Clinton

Cortana vs Hillary Clinton

• Occurs in: "Master Chief vs Hillary Clinton"
• Combatants: Cortana vs Hillary Clinton
• Deaths: Hillary Clinton
• Summary: Cortana encountered Clinton in the Ark's hanger, where they fought again. This time, Cortana finally managed to kill her sister.

Heroes vs the King

Master Chief and the Arbiter vs the King

Master Chief and the Arbiter vs the King

• Occurs in: "Master Chief: The Second Finale (Part 1)" and "Master Chief: The Second Finale (Part 2)"
• Combatants: Master Chief and the Arbiter vs the King
• Summary: In the Ark's laser firing room, Master Chief and the Arbiter had a pitched lightsaber duel with the King. Eventually, the King wounded Master Chief, and the battle ended.

Master Chief vs the King

• Occurs in: "Master Chief: The Second Finale (Part 2)"
• Combatants: Master Chief vs the King
• Summary: The King challenged Master Chief to a one-on-one fistfight. The battle was a draw.

Avery Johnson vs Ronald McDonald

• Occurs in: "Master Chief Sucks at Ordering Burger King"
• Combatants: Avery Johnson vs Ronald McDonald
• Other Participants: The King
• Summary: Right as Ronald was about to execute the King, Sergeant Johnson returned and tackled him. The pair got into a violent fight before the King saved Johnson right as Ronald was about to kill him. Ronald survived and time travelled to the year 2020.

Heroes vs the Ancients (Round 1)

Master Chief and the Arbiter vs the Ancients

• Occurs in: "Master Chief Sucks at Ordering Burger King"
• Combatants: Master Chief and the Arbiter vs Ronald McDonald, Oprah Winfrey, Bill Gates, and Reggie Fils-Aime
• Other Participants: Steve Jobs
• Summary: Master Chief shot Steve Jobs as he and the Arbiter snuck past the Ancients, and a massive shootout occured. No one was killed, and the battle ended when Master Chief shot an explosive barrel as a distraction to escape.

Heroes vs the Ancients (Round 2)

The King and Ronald vs the Ancients

• Occurs in: "Master Chief Sucks at Rescue Missions"
• Combatants: Master Chief, the Arbiter, Cortana, the King, and Avery Johnson vs Ronald McDonald, Oprah Winfrey, Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, and Reggie Fils-Aime
• Other Participants: 343 Guilty Spark
• Deaths: Steve Jobs
• Summary: After reviving Cortana, the trio ran into the Ancients in the control room of Installation 04. Another shootout began, and the King and Johnson arrived from the year 44 BC to help the heroes. The Arbiter shot Steve Jobs in the head and Master Chief wounded Ronald, who proceeded to activate the ring.

The King vs Ronald

• Occurs in: "Master Chief: The Secret Origin of the King"
• Combatants: The King vs Ronald McDonald
• Summary: This short battle occurs the earliest chronologically, in 1993, on the day of Master Chief's birth. The King confronted Ronald, who planned to implant the Building 69 coordinates in Master Chief's memories. The King tried to stop him, but Ronald threatened to reveal his true identity (Caesar Charlemagne), and the King relented.

The King vs the Ancients

• Occurs in: "Master Chief: The Secret Origin of the King"
• Combatants: The King vs Ronald McDonald, Bill Gates, Reggie Fils-Aime, and the Halo security forces
• Deaths: Halo security forces, Bill Gates, Reggie Fils-Aime, the King
• Summary: After healing Ronald, the King was confronted by the Halo security guards and remaining Ancients. They opened fire on Ronald, badly wounding him, but he then fought back, killing Gates and Reggie. Ronald then shot him in the head.

Avery Johnson vs the King

• Occurs in: "Master Chief Sucks at Plot Twists"
• Combatants: Avery Johnson vs the King
• Other Participants: Master Chief, the Arbiter, Cortana
• Deaths: Avery Johnson
• Summary: At Building 69, the King revealed himself to be alive and an AI who had finally gained control of the program that would give him ultimate control over the universe. Johnson held off the King while telling his friends to escape, but as the battle reached its climax, the King revealed he was Johnson's old friend Caesar Charlemagne. Despite this revelation, Johnson refused to join him, and was disintegrated by the King's new powers.

Final Battle: Master Chief vs the King

Round 1

The final battle

• Occurs in: "Master Chief Sucks at Everything (Part 2)"
• Combatants: Master Chief vs the King
• Summary: Master Chief, having lost Cortana, met the Voice, who sent him to the King's location. The King questioned Master Chief's desire to fight despite knowing of the King's ultimate power and destiny to destroy him, and they engaged in a massive physical fight in the rain-stricken city.

Round 2

• Occurs in: "Master Chief Sucks at Everything (Part 3)"
• Combatants: Master Chief vs the King
• Other Participants: The Voice
• Deaths: Master Chief, the King
• Summary: Master Chief hid from the King, but when the King threatened to kill the Arbiter after having already killed Johnson and Cortana, the enraged Master Chief attacked and overpowered him. However, Master Chief realized if he killed the King, he would simply be rebooted again. Master Chief remembered Cortana's words about every AI having a purpose, and subsequently allowed the King to disintegrate him. The King's victory was short lived, however, because the Voice informed him of his completed destiny, and proceeded to destroy him. Master Chief was later resurrected by the Voice, but chose to enter the real world instead of staying in the fictional one.